I AM OBESE!!!!

Me 3/19/12

For years I have been "heavy".  Not too bad just "plus sized".  These are lies I told to myself.  I am pretty even though I am large but pretty starts to fade the larger you get.  The pictures I have of me are always startling.   I can't believe that it is really me or that I've gotten this big.  Scales don't lie.  A few months ago I topped out at 320 lbs.  Enough is enough.  Time to face the truth.  I am Morbidly Obese. 
 

me in 2003 @ 200#

Even though I am morbidly obese, I do not have the typical health problems.  I am not diabetic.  I do not have high cholesterol.  I do not have high blood pressure.  I do not have sleep apnea.  I do not have heart issues.  So it was easy for me to ignore my weight as it climbed steadily higher.   Oh I did diet from time to time.  In 2003, I lost 80# doing the Atkins Diet.  I was able to do it for several months. I got down to 200#.   I felt great but I was not changing habits, I just substituted low carb versions of the junk I've been eating all along.  The cost of the food and the stress of my husband being in Colorado eventually added up.  I went right off the diet and of course put the weight on.  In 2008 I got up to 300# and freaked out.  Once again hubby was in another town and I needed to get the house sold but this time I was workng as well.  This time I started counting calories and changing what I ate.  In three months I was down to 270# and still losing.  But once we were all together in Georgia I didn't stick to it.  So once again I am huge. 



Me in 2009 back up to 280#

A year and half ago I had a health scare.  Nothing to do with my weight but a big scare. Fortunately it was just a scare and I am as healthy as ever.  But the doctor, who was seeing me for the first time, handed me a pamphlet on the Lap-Band.  I spent 6 months looking into it, determined up to the very end that this was my answer.  After some very serious consideration I abandoned the idea.  I know what to do to lose weight.  I know that I can lose weight.  Last spring I was given reason to suspect that my husband is diabetic.  After many months of nagging (and having a child rat him out to his doctor), my suspicions were confirmed.  I have spent the last 9 months learning how to deal with his health.  My weight went up to 320#.  I am a stress eater and chocolate is the biggest comfort food in my life.  Brownies specifically.  I have been out of control.

Fortunately for me, the company I work for, John B Sanfilippo & Son Inc, is concerned about the well being of their employees.  For the past few months I have been working with employees from all 5 of the plants to come up a wellness challenge.  This includes a weight loss challenge and a walking challenge.  Now don't get me wrong, I've done the walking challenge before and lost a few pounds.  I just didn't pursue it with the attitude of getting well.  As soon as the challenge was over I stopped walking. 

The last picture of me resembling a Ball, 317#

Anyway, while doing research for the challenges, my friend Kris found out that the insurance company has a fitness program.  $25 a month to go to member fitness centers and do their basic fitness package. Plus you can go to any of the fitness centers on the list in any town.  The Bainbridge Curves and the Cairo Fitness center are both members.

We had the wellness fair at work was on 3/16.  Kris did an excellent job of getting several different health providers there and they all took our insurance.  One of the providers was the Curves in Bainbridge.  Of course we are on a tight budget and I hate to spend money on exercise.  But on 3/18, I dropped in at the Curves.  After learning more about the program and deciding that I can do it, I joined the fitness program and got myself into Curves.  My initial visit was on Tuesday 5/23 and my first work out was on Wednesday 5/24.

My current goal is to get down to a size 16 and/or 200#.  I will go to Curves after work, before driving home to Cairo.(60 min commute) So I will still have some energy.  I have 3 workout outfits so no excuse there.  Curves is open until 7:00pm so no excuse there.  Plus I have done 3 workouts this past week.  I can do this!  It is not a eventually as you get thinner you will be able to do this.  I can do it NOW.  I know that as I get healthier, I will do more reps and have to work harder to get my heart rate up.  But right now in this shape I CAN DO IT. 

I invite you all to join me as I attempt to walk/run down the path to wellness.  Some victories may be small and some may seem silly but I will celebrate them all.  I will also be honest about weight gain and other set backs.  I hope there are some out there who will join me, if only in spirit.